Growing Up Across Cultures vs. Visiting Them as Adults
How a nomadic childhood shapes us differently than adult travel and cultural exploration.
Roots or wings?
For me, the phrase “roots and wings” represents the balance between having a deep sense of connection to where we come from (our roots) while also embracing the freedom to explore and grow (our wings). For some of us, the home and culture we were exposed to as children shaped our roots, while the experiences we pursue as adults form our wings. But what happens when those roots are planted in more than one spot?
Growing up in different cultures isn’t just an experience; it’s something that becomes a part of you. We’re called Third Culture Kids (TCK). The traditions, the languages—they don’t just fade away when you leave. They’re engraved, shaping how you see the world and how you carry yourself. Visiting a new culture as an adult, on the other hand, is fleeting. It’s enriching and enjoyable, yes, but it’s often just a moment—a chapter, not the whole book.
As a child, moving between countries means figuring out who you are while the world around you keeps shifting. Your sense of identity doesn’t have a fixed starting point; instead, it blends and evolves with each new place. You might find pieces of yourself in every culture you’ve lived in, making your identity something fluid and layered.
By adulthood, though, identity is more stable. Most adults already have a strong sense of self, and cultural experiences tend to build on that identity rather than change it. For instance, when adults immerse themselves in a new culture, they often have a clear feeling of “home” to anchor them. Even if they’re exploring far-off places, they can usually point to one location that feels like where they belong.
How Growing Up TCK Shapes You Differently
For those of us who grew up in different cultural contexts, adaptability becomes second nature. Being the “new kid” time and time again forces you to pick up on social cues, adjust to different customs, and adapt to new languages—quickly and intuitively. It’s not something you think about; it just happens.
Adults who explore new cultures might be curious and eager to immerse themselves, but they’re often visitors. They bring their own concept of home with them and interpret their new surroundings from that perspective. As a third-culture kid, there’s no single “home base” guiding you. You learn to make home wherever you are, turning it into a concept rather than a place.
What This Means for Both Journeys
Both experiences offer a unique perspective, regardless of whether you were raised exploring many cultures or you decided to do so later in life. Those with a third-culture upbringing often have an appreciation for diversity ingrained into who they are. They see things from multiple perspectives and have a natural curiosity about other lifestyles.
For travelling adults, stepping into a new culture can feel like stepping into a new pair of shoes—an adjustment, but one you choose. It might not reshape your sense of self, but it can strengthen it and offer new views you carry back with you.
Finding the Balance Between Roots and Wings
For some, growing up in a multicultural environment feels like being handed wings without knowing where to land. For others, travelling later in life feels like a way to stretch those wings. Neither is better or worse—they’re just different paths to understanding ourselves and the world around us.
Maybe that’s the beauty of it. Whether we’re born into it or seek it out, connecting with other cultures is a reminder of how much there is to learn—and how much we carry with us wherever we go.
